How do you stop a baby from falling into a manhole? You catch it, and then call the appropriate services and inform them of the dangerous open manhole.

knock, knock who's there? I'm here to kill u! I'm here to kill u who? .......

roses are red , violets are blue , sugar is sweet and so are you. the roses are wilting the violets are dead. the sugar bowl is empty and so is your head

A man walked into a Persian dentist office. After a few hours he leaves the office with his mouth feeling much better because the oral-surgery went exeptionally well.

Hey my names cliff. You should drop by sometime

If life throws you melons, not only might you be dyslexic, but you are probably also uneducated, since the phrase is "if life gives you lemons".

What do you call a black man climbing a mountain. A mountain climber.

Your mom.

Q. what is catness and pita name together pines

What is invisible, weighs 332 pounds, runs 67.3 mph, is green, and is made by Jews in China. Nothing, if something is invisible, then it cannot reflect green light, therefore it cannot be green.

Whats the difference imbetween a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to hit with a sledge hammer an the other is a watermelon

Murder me once, shame on you.

why did the homeless man buy a mansion? he didn't. i lied. he would need a job to be able to buy a mansion.

knock knock. who's there myhairs myhairs who myhairs fallen out

What do black people eat for breakfast? Cereal.

Why did the Mexican choose the blue marker over the green one? Because he his favorite color was green, and it was Opposite Day.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FbuluDBHpfQ

http://logs.omegle.com/de4e4b0

Did you hear about the plane that crashed and killed 1000 people? My sister has cancer.

I made a sandwich Lol jk, my gf made it for me

Yo mamma's so old... oh way no she's dead

Q: What did the Mexican kid get for Christmas? A: My bike.

WHY DID THE CHICKEN FART SO LOAD TO GET EVRYYBODY ATENTION

What do you call a homosexual in the army? A brave and honorable person who should be applauded for their service to this great nation

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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