How many elephants can you fit in a car? Five. Two in the front, two in the back, and one in the glove compartment.

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What's black and chrispy inside? A black guy with bonecancer

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Roses are red, Violets are red, my eyes are bleeding

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You know what helps with back pain? If you lick my butt hole.

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Yo momma so fat you have aids

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What starts with "F" and ends with "uck"? F*ck

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme but this one doesn't

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Whats the difference between a ferrari and a boner? Too much to list.

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obama

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Why was the light on in the house ? A. the owners were using it

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Zombies eat brains! (You're safe)

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What did one musician say to the other? "We should have gone to college."

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What did the Jew say to the other Jew? Found a penny the other day....

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what do you call an astrounaut in space? an astrounaut you racist bastard

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why is the name Brian so funny BECAUSE IT IS!

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I created darkness. God created the stars. God created the bee. I created the wasp. God created the child. I banged your mother. Moral: Soon my wings of darkness shall destroy your very own star, these words seem empty now, so I will fill them with true meaning and purpose as I will give the same to you the day the sky brightens no more.

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When life throws knives at you, run away.

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A man walks into town and takes a shit!

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There once was a man from Nantucket, Whose body parts were all adequate and thus could not perform any odd sexual acts upon himself.

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Person 1: Knock knock Person 2: Who is there??? Person 1: ..................................... Person 2: (Opens Door) Person 1: BOO i scared u and ding dong ditched u Person 2: Actually "Ding Dong Ditching" is when a one or more human beings search for a targeted house where they ring the door bell and run to a designated location to hide. After the resident opens the door to find out no one has stayed and waited, they close the door and the human beings quickly run up and repeat the task many as times until the resident finally catches them.

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Knock knock Who's there Santa who santa hates you and that is why you got nothing for Christmastime

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

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Roses are red Violets are blue S*** is brown and so are you

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Roses are red violets are blue I would test our new water bed so be carefull with your helled shoe!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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