whose better then Sarah, Georgia and ellie NO ONE!!!!

How do you make a baby cry? Drop a brick on its head.

Why are the British so uptight? I don't think they are.

Dani barton= lovely

Jackson gets a new phone he drops it what does he have. (a beating )

Why did the little boy fall of his swing? Some one killed him.

Man is hit by a falling tree his friend immediately responds "Got Wood" the man is now paraplegic

Knock knock Come In.......

Why did the Muslim get on the plane in New York? To go visit his dying aunt in Memphis.

Joseph had been temporarily blinded for over a year. While blind, he saw the doctor who told him he would regain sight the next morning when he woke up. For this special moment, Joseph decided that the first thing he wanted to see was his wife. So, his wife decided to stay up all night so she was in the right position for when Joseph woke up. However, when Joseph woke up and opened his eyes his wife wasn't there so he was a little bit annoyed.

You're so gay you actively seek homosexuals relationships.

An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can't talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it's a bird of prey.

What's the difference between the sky and the ocean? They're both blue

why is santa so jolly? hes not hes a fictional character made up by our parents imagination

See now that is confident and down to earth, reasonable, and all the etc etc`s, so what would you like me to fill them in with? Joking aside, you are smart, funny, you take a beating (sorry that`s today`s new low point, I have never hit a woman and never will, sure I punched down the GigaLesb when she lifted me up and my spine started making cracking noises, but that does not technically count as a woman). You are sweet, you are cute, you are funny, you are hot hot hot (hattrick see?), and yeah yeah if you want me to prove to people here that we know each other, sure, I met you once like 15 years ago? You kinda adored me, I could not take my eyes of yours (oh yeah, you got adorable eyes sure), and... You got huge breasts (Tits are more like those hanging you know what I mean) Sigh sometimes a boy wonders what he is doing with his life, he falls for the strangest girls... ...AND THEN SAID BOY FINDS HIMSELF BROKEN IN TWINE BY ME!

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

Whats the hardest part of eating a vegetable? The wheelchair.

babe whos moaning? are you with another woman? guy:god damn if you would stay in the kitchen we would never have any problems.

Q) 1+1=? A) 6.

I saw a poor man named rich

why did the homeless man buy a mansion? he didn't. i lied. he would need a job to be able to buy a mansion.

what did one picture frame say to the other? Well you could answer with hows it hanging but thats not logical because they are inanimate

A man walks into a bar. We see him as he approaches the register wearing a dark hoody. The surveillance camera seen here catches a glimpse of the man's face appearing to be a white male with mustache and beard. As you can see the man opens the register and takes the money before the bartender can get to him. If you have any information about this crime please call crime stoppers at 1-800-GET-HELP. In other news, the DOW JONES reached a record high today as investors in China begin working on keeping the economy from plundering.

Libyans stage a protest. They get massacred.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...