Betty Whites ALIVE?

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Q: how many oxen does it take to row up the empire state building in half of a green canoe under the purple sun while eating a dead moose with no arms? A: Purple, because snakes have no elbows.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Not having enough money to buy an apple.

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Why did the girl jump? Because she was on a trampoline.

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Why does Eli Manning play for the Giants? Because he is huge.

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knock knock whos there? the police, your under arrest

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Cancer

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I like my women like I like my coffee. Without a penis

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What do you call a black man holding a pistol? A black man holding a pistol

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What's green, long, and covered in forks? Grass. I lied about the forks.

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

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What did the pregnant teenager get for her birthday? An abortion.

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Whats hotter than a sunny day. A pot of boiling water.

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A blonde, a brunette and a red head engage in a discussion on World politics. The brunette says she would like to see politicians paying more attention to the environment. The red head says she would like to see improvements in the economy. The blonde says she has to poop.

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Roses are red Violets are? blue I'm going to rape you in the ass with a rake.

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Why didn't the boy go to school? He was sick.

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What is the difference between my elbow and my penis? I Cant lick my elbow

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there's two nuns cycling down a cobbled street. one nun says:ooo iv'e never been this way before! the other nun says:i'm not surprised there's roadworks and a diversion!

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Women's rights

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How many chicken feathers are there in a 50 pound bag? 50 pounds worth Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a duck Why did the man cross the road? It was duck season A woman is dying but can't reach her husband. Why? A duck ate his cell-phone A pig walks into a bar but there is no bartender. Where is she? Dead A duck hunter is selling a duck to a man. The man only pays the duck hunter a quarter. Why? It was full of chicken feathers.

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why did suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms. knock knock. who's there? well, its not suzie.

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I've done a lot of soul searching, and.... I've realized.... the & symbol really looks like a man dragging his butt on the ground.

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you know whats weird about italians? their italian

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Hi

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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