How do you make a boy cry? Pour soup on his head.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

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How do Chinese parents name their children? With deep thought and consideration about a thoughtful, respectful and honorable name.

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What was the black guy doing in Mississippi? Just hanging around.

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What's sweet and tastes like candy? Candy, now get in the van.

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What do you get when u cross a owl and a bungy cord...........my ass

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Whats included in over 90% of all car crashes? A Car

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Great ideas: Go to your facebook account and type in: Man, I am gonna suicide right now, bye! Moral: Now if you do it as well, nah, dont do it, seriously... Just type it!

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A horse walks into a bar, the bar tender says" why the long face". The horse, unable to comprehend English just shits on the floor and leaves

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A man walks into a bar after a hard day of work, and he meets this girl and they really kick it off, so the girl says, "lets go somewhere more, private" and they both go to a more secluded bar that has less decibels of noise.

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Why did the plane crash The pilot, being an uneducated pilot, crashed the plane as he didn't have proper training, and the whole of the passengers died.

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Roses are blue Violets are red It's fascinating what genetic engineering can do

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Three guys walk into a bar: a Priest, a rapist, and a pedophile...and two other guys

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roses are red violets are blue if you and your sister were hanging from a cliff i'd save your sister

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Why did the bus driver tell the black man to get to the back of the bus? Because all the seats up front were full and its dangerous to stand in a moving vehicle

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(Pretend you're an orphan.) Knock knock. Who's there? Not your parents.

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Whats slower than molasses? Slightly thicker molasses.

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What is worst then 9/11? What? Tiger woods

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Yo Mama is so poor, she can barely keep a steady income and cannot support her family of 10 even with support of food stamps and wel fair and will probably die soon due to diabetees because she wasted her food stamps on food that is bad for the average persons diet and due to a lack of exercise. I am worried about her she seems very depressed due to her wight and fatality outlooks and you should probably direct her to your local clinic to make sure she is OK and try to help her with her weight mangment problems. I am scarred for you and your family and I wanted to make sure you are ok and are doing well in education and are on track for a very bright future probably going to a universety which you will pay for with student loans from a bank in the local area. I am extremely worried so are you OK with all of those things I said before and if you are not I can help you get onto the right track and your mom can have a happier longeer life filled with fun happinnes wisdom life and other things like peace and forgivness for all people should get that it is part of our natural human rights and we deserve such things I speak of. Are you ok and does your life apply to thing things I have said in the past couple of motivational minuites. ''get the fu^k off porch''

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What is an offensive way to refer to black people from the time of the Flint Stones? Niggers

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what falls from the sky, is white, and can kill you a refrigerator

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whats worse than getting caught by a teacher for chewing gum? getting kidnapped by a giant hawk.

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Snake: YES muahaha Eve eat the fruit from the three of wisdom muahahaha! Why do you not share with Adam? Muahahaha! Snake: Why is nothing happening? Then the sky opened and a heavenly voice spoke: "Well as long as none eats fruit from the three of KNOWLEDGE... Hmm, I better get rid of it altogether..." Snake: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

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Three drunk llamas wearing sombreros are walking down the street. They walk in silence, lost in their own thoughts.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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