A girl and a boy where sitting on a couch together. The boy told the girl politly that she hass gained a significant amount of weight and should lose it. She then pulled out a candy bar in her back pocket and shoved it down his throat, to which he suffocated, because she was on her period when to comment was made.

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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A coach walks into the team dressing room at halftime; his team is down 42-0. He screams at the players, "You guys are playing like a bunch of grannies. No offense"

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I banged your mom so hard that she got a urinary tract infection.

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69

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How do you suppress a black hole? Surround it with white holes

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A.do i have alzheimer's? B.yes A.do i have alzheimer's?

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Confucius say: Man who fart in church probably has a medical condition and should not be made fun of because that is cruel.

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Shut up max im not fucking demented u dickhead

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A: What do you call a female bombing the white house? Q: A terrorist

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What do you call a black man selling drugs? A pharmacist

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What happened when a 16 year old guy went over to his friends party? found out he wasn't friends with anyone there, got kicked out and committed suicide.

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Knock Knock. (No answer) Knocker: " I guess the resident of this home isn't home at this hour."

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Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

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Why was a white man mowing his lawn ? The lawn was getting undesirably long which provoked the white man.

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You want some cake? Sure! Okay, go buy the ingridients and bake me some. YAY!

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Stephen Hawking can walk

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A devout Christian dies. Peter winks as his soul passes through the impenetrable Gates of Heaven. Everyone is gay and– like, gay as in happy– Fags aren't allowed in Heaven.

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Knock knock: Who's there? Guy in the doghouse. Guy in the doghouse who? WILL YOU LET ME OUT OF HERE?!?

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Roses are red my shirt is blue don't take my money, their not for u -_-

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whats black and red all over? a chalk board

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The frightened girl did everything the man said. " Open your legs. Bend over..." She was playing Simon says and was afraid to loose. It wasn't sexual abuse, which her sister had experienced while traveling around the world in 2007.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I can not rhyme, Show me your tits

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Q: A vandal walked into a bar. What did the bartender say? A: Nothing, the vandal had covered him and the bar in pritt stick before he had the opportunity to speak, then left with his penguin accomplice, Reginald the third.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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