Why was little timmy crying? He walk in on his dad molesting a minor.

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What do you call a blonde at the beach? A dipthong.

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"How high are you?" "I don't know, sir." "Well, look at the god damn altimeter."

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why did the guy laugh at everything he was high

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Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: A kid fell in the mud.

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Q: You know what never gets old? A: The kids in a school shooting

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A Jew walks into a bar and says drinks are on me.

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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What more fun than a barrel full of monkeys? A barrel of dead babies

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sunflowers are yellow, Daises are white.

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Why wasn't the cab driver sent to prison after bombing the school? It was a suicide bombing.

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Why do showers have 11 holes? Because Jews only have 10 fingers

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69

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Q: What do you get when you mix root beer with a cloud? A: Nothing, you idiot.

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What did the the water hose say to the man? Nothing, but the sight of water made the man thirsty and he drank to excess and died from dilution of his blood.

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whats worse than having the flu? having cancer

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How do you make a person dissapear? You can't that would break the laws of physics, so therefore rendered impossibe.

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Where does Mario go after you finish the game? Drug rehab.

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Kid A:We're home alone, you know what that means. Kid B:Cover ourselves in vaseline and slide around like slugs on the kitchen floor? Kid A:Yes

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Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

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Knock, knock! Who's there? No one. No one actually knocked on your door because this is just a joke.

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Person 1: Why can't a T-Rex clap? Person 2: BECAUSE THEIR ARMS ARE TOO SMALL! Person 1: No, because they are extinct dumbass

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What did the hand say to the face? Nothing because body parts cannot speak.

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A jumpercable walks in the bar the bartender says ill get you something but dont start anything.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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