there are two muffins in an oven one muffin says "whoa, its hot in here!" the other says nothing, because it is a muffin, and the other muffin, in reality, said nothing either.

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Joey: hey bobby who you talking to? Bobby: oh yeah I forgot to tell you your mom died.

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I'm going to rewrite history. History.

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what does pedobear get for christmas ? nothing he's the one giving love to all kids .

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Why did the bird fall out of the sky? It had no wings.

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What's worse than a piece of food stuck between your teeth? I don't know, what? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

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Why did grandma drop the dish? She had a heart attack and died, falling to the ground and thus bringing the plate with her to the floor.

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Stripper went to strip club to ask for work. - It was closed

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why did the baby die? It was hit by a bus and then raped by a seal.

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Why did Suzie's friend put rubbish in her mouth? Because Suzie is a rubbish bin.

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how do u make a baby cry? you shouldnt. Stop thinking of ways to make a kid cry... asshole.

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What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing, fruit can't talk.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet You have pancreatic cancer

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why is the spine-tailed swift the fastest bird? because its faster than the second fastest bird.

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KNOCK KNOCK whos there Malcom i dont know any Malcom go away!

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Roses are red, My name is Dave, This poem makes no sense, Microwave.

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Why did the black man take the watermelon? Because he bought it, and watermelons are delicious.

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An irishman walks into a bar and drinks 6 pints of guiness. He then drives himself home and savagely beats his wife and children.

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

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why did the boat sink the captain drove it into a pile of sharp rocks

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Why was the black kid at school? Because he wanted to receive an education.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra drinks a bear and leafs .....

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Knock Knock Who's There Mailman Mailman who? Sir, I don't have time for this, take your mail.

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What's brown and sticky? A lump of shit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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