Why did the chicken cross the park? To get to the other slide.

What did Tommy's father tell him on Christmas? Nothing, he was violently stabbed to death on Christmas Eve.

Q: Why was the blonde so dumb? A: Because she wasn't properly educated.

A van drives into a car. An hour earlier, the man who was driving the van walked into a bar.

What did the man say to his wife before they went to bed? Goodnight.

how do you wash clothes in the diswasher? you turn it on.

Yo momma's so short, it's probably because she's in a wheelchair.

Yo mama so fat even Dora couldn't explore her!

Lacrosse

Why did the girl fall off the swing set? Because she had no arms.

Knock knock Who's there? Me. Idiot.

What do you call a mexican sleeping in a car tired.

If I have $5 and Chuck Norris has $5, we both have the same monetary value.

What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot.

whats straight as a fudge packer kyle grund

Knock Knock! Who's there? No-one No-one who? .......

kennah campion... being nice

A Starfish walks into a bar. He sits down next to a man with a concussion. Q: What did the man say? A: Nothing because he was in a concussion and was no longer able to say words.

What's worse then having Casey Anthony babysit your child? A girl asking, "Is it in?"

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? seriously all my friends r Dbags n break the door down...wow ur polite....um ok WHO'S THERE? THE REAPER oh sh** dude! NO ONES HOME! "in other news this evening, two local men found dead on theyre living room floors. Police say the front door was smashed in...an obvious sign of forced entry. The two men were apparently reading a webpage called anti-joke before suddenly having an unexplained heart attack and dieing....heh heh hey nancy...why did the chicken cross the road? because he thuroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic." "HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.......GASP! GA FA! GAA *gargle*" "wow...in other OTHER news i just killed nancy...."*runs* JOKES KILL >:}

What do you call a black man who flies planes? A pilot, what do you call him you freaking racist!?!?!?!?!?

Why can't Tommy the T-Rex clap? Because dinosaurs have been extinct for 65 Million years.

Why do people often give Jimmy strange looks? Because Jimmy has Down Syndrome

What do you call a man with no arms or legs wearing lead weights in a pool? Screwed.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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