Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What does a spider Pig do? Nothing. They dont exist.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

why dont you hit a black kid on a bike? its probably your bike.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How do you have se with hellen keller? Very sweetly

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How do you make a blond cry? You punch her in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Whats worse than failing an English test? finding out your now exgirlfriend has aids.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Life is like the Titanic. You cruise along on course and everything is great -- until you hit an iceberg and 1,517 people die.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

what doesn't kill you makes you crippled for life because you lost use of your legs in a tragic car accident

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she has no arms

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How many alcoholics does it take to change a light bulb? Look. I just enjoy a few drinks every now and then. I mean, I can quit whenever I want to. That's no reason to start people calling names.. Wait, no. That's not.. Look. How much do you drink every day, huh? Why not ask that? And why do I have to be the one changing your stupid light bulb? If it's sooooo important that the light bulb be changed, do it yourself, you lazy bastard. Don't rely on other people to do your work for you.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What is white and flys at you from a tree? A refridgarator. I lied about the flying part.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A woman has sex with an Asian man, then a white man, and then a black man. She chooses to be in a relationship with the black man because he is prepared for the responsibilities of a relationship and the other two men, though both are well endowed, are not ready.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A Horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks the horse, "Why the long face?". The horse didn't understand English, so he took a shit on the floor, and left.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

My friends a Jehovahs Witness. He got all pissed at me because he tried to tell me a knock knock joke and I ignored him.......i totally stole this joke lol.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why can't Hellen Keller watch Spongebob? She doesn't have the proper cable service

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Why did the baby fall off the swing? Because i hit it with a bat.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why couldn't Billy see the show? Because Billy is blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - I am a lawyer and you're a doctor.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Knock knock Fuck off!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do chicken and babies have in common? They both taste like chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you call a black man flying a plane? The pilot. You racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the cannibal eat for breakfast? Waffles.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

The one under this is a fake. i wrote the real one

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops