Mom now that I am fourteen can I get a bra now? No Harold!

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Whats really ugly and horny Jake's mom

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why did the mexican steal the money? because he was financially struggling and needed the money to support his family

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Why did the asbestos cross the road? Because it was being removed from an elementary school due to the fact that asbestos is an air pollutant which is regulated under section 112 of the Clean Air Act of 1970.

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What's worse than farting in front of your boyfriend? Farting on your boyfriends pillow and giving him pink eye.

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Sam slept and never woke up again.. Because he followed his dream.

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Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michaelangelo.

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Tiger woods is a famous golf player and Santa is a fictional old man dressed in red and white who is said to live in Lapland, have an airborne sleigh driven by eight magical reindeer and come down the chimney to fill childrens' stockings on Christmas eve.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To distract everyone from the Mexican.

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What is six foot three, plays basketball, and is black? A black dog with basketball skills and takes steroids.

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why did the plane crash because the pilot was a tomato

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A lost young boy walks into a bar to ask for a map. The Bartender takes him into a room and rapes him.

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Why do jews have large noses? Genetics.

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What looks like mud, smells like mud and eats mud? An African

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A lot eh?

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Once upon a time a was born

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Got a card in the mail from my estranged uncle today. Yep.

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What did the one stethoscope say to the other stethoscope? Nothing. Stethoscopes can't talk.

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What is the difference between Switzerland and Sudan? One is in Europe the other is in Africa

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What do a baby and a slinky have in common? They both bring a smile to your face when you push then down a flight of stairs.

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Why did the ground beef taste funny? Because little Timmy fell in the grinder.

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Why did the African boy die? He was denied any antibiotics to heal his severe case of mono and AIDS, and was living on dirty water and dirt.

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Why do seagulls live by the sea? Because they wouldn't be able to live anywhere else.

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Two men are walking down the street. They both don't make eye contact and continue walking.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops