Jeez Bill, how drunk was I last night? You took my pet parakeet, threw it at my daughter's piggy bank and yelled "ANGRY BIRDS!!!!"

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A man questions wether a cat will always land on it's feet. He takes a cat from a pet store and tosses it into the air. The cat lands on it's feet. Startled, the cat runs into the street and gets hit by a car. The man goes to prison for theft and animal abuse.

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Recycled jokes are about as good as a scalar roundabout... [L]

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A family walks into a talent agency. Talen agent says "Okay, what's your act called?" Dad replies "The Aristocrats!"

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What did Hitler say to the Nazis? I have a mustache.

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why wuz 6 afraid of 7 7 had a gun

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What's green and blue, and red all over? Nothing. It if were red all over it wouldn't be green and blue.

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Roses are red Violets are purple, and anyone who tells you otherwise is wrong.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a swimming pool? Determined.

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Yo momma's so fat that when she asked the doctor, he said she could have such bad cardiovascular problems if yo mamma keep the typical sedentary habits, wich consist in a diet with a lots of fat and sugar, the lack of physical exercise and genetical characterists which make a person get fatter more easily.

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how do you save a black man ... u don't

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Q. What did the boy do for his birthday? A. Nothing. His birthday occurred on 9-11.

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Why did the German burn the Jew? Because he dropped his tea.

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I dyed my armpit hair blue yesterday because I wanted to start a new trend. My boyfriend later broke up with me.

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What did the homeless man buy with a dollar? Nothing. He didn't have a dollar.

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Why did Schrödinger's Cat cross the road? It didn't

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whats older than your mom? a tortoise that has been living more than a couple hundred years

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A ham sandwich walks into a bar, bartender says "We don't serve food here."

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Why the african children was sad? - Because an octopus bite his arm

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whats worse than getting caught by a teacher for chewing gum? getting kidnapped by a giant hawk.

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Why did the boy throw the clock out of the window? Because it was broken.

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"Free to play" Play free "right now" "Free forever"

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What's sad about 3 black people going over a cliff in a Cadillac? Cadillac's seat 6

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Pickle

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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