An american family is picknicking on the bottom of the ocean. They are eating french fries, big mac's, chicken mc nuggets and drinking coca cola, some slurpies too, all purchased at the local mac donalds near lyndon blvd, in chevy chase near that weird house with the toothless lady that always smiles and then all of a sudden frowns at you, often wearing either a dark green or mint green dress. Spongebob squarepants comes drifting by dead in circular pants and little Sally, their youngest daughter asks a question, which cannot be heard because they're underwater.

What does the fox say? Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding!

is this the krusty krab? no, this is patrick.

Why did the chicken cross the mobius strip? to ge to the same side

Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

What's black, blue, and read all over? The newspaper.

Words with two W's or N's in them are awkward and unnecessary

A dog walks into a bar. He's a service animal, so this is allowed.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because on the other side of the road people don't question his motives

Why was the chinese man kicked out of the bar? Because he was under aged

2 muffins are in a oven for 30 minutes, the baker then questions why he only baked 2 muffins.

How many different ways can you kill a cat? 27, unless you live in Russia then it's 28

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They scolded her and sent her to her room.

What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

roses are red violets are blue most poems rhyme but this one doesnt

What is the difference between a pig and a crow? One is a animal that Is butchered to be eaten as a wonderful meat product. And the other is a pretentious asshole bird that no one likes.

person 1. Did you here about the black guy who went to college? person 2.no person 1. either have i whats ironic is that they are both black

what starts with f and ends with c k....???? FIRETRUCK

what has wheels and is red. A heart, i lied about the wheels.

A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

Why did the Hispanic man have drugs in his pocket? He had just gone to the pharmacy.

Sometimes i like to stand on my chair and pretend that i am a carrot.

Do you know whats funny? No do you know i was asking a question

What did the apple say to the grape? Nothing, fruit are incapable of speaking

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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