Q: How do you turn lights on and off? A: With a switch

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Yo mama so fat that you should maintain strong eye contact with her and not look at her body.

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A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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What's brown and sticky? "A stick?" No, poo.

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A woman takes a shortcut through a dark alley. She is raped, robbed, and murdered. Her family mourns her death.

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What does Chuck Norris order at McDonalds? A Big Mac with a large fry and drink.

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A bar walks into a man... Wait, that's impossible.

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knock knock. Who is there? You have. You have who? Your entire family in my basement.

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A man felt a pain in his stomach. He went to the doctor.

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Wath black poeple eat for christmas your food.

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Deja moo: The feeling you've heard this bull before.

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How can you tell if a duck is under your bed? Look under your bed

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven they say nothing to eachother because they are muffins and cannot speak if they did they would most likely be taken by the US government and studied and assumed to be alien life forms but anyway the muffins were taken out later and presumably eaten

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My brother is crazy... crazy like a fox! I caught him eating a Possum on the side of the road yesterday.

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what did the white guy say to the black guy at the homeless shelter? Hi.

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If 2 wrongs make a right and 2 rights make a wrong, then when you have 4 rights=2 wrongs, you have a true statement. If you have 8 rights = 4 wrongs, you have a verified statement.

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Knock Knock. You don't have a door.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple Getting raped by a hose

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Why do black people make the best milkshakes? because they use the finest ingredients

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what do a blonde and a brunette have in common? They were both red-heads until they walked into great clips.

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What happens if you're caught strangling a purple leprechaun? You are taken to a mental institution because you have schizophrenia

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There are 11 people hanging onto a rope that comes down from an airplane. 10 of them are blonde, and one is a brunette. They all decide that one person should get off because if they don't, the rope will break and everyone will die. No one can decide who should go, so finally the brunette delivers a very touching speech, ending with the words, "I'll get off." The blondes, all moved by the brunette's speech, start clapping. Problem solved.

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Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says: "Man it's hot in here!" The other muffin looks over and says "Holy cow a talking muffin!"

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I met her back in the 80s when she was a man.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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