A brunette, a redhead, and a blond are all stuck on an island 100 miles away from the nearest civilization with no resources. After 2 weeks, they decide that no one is going to save them and they have to swim for it. The brunette swims 25 miles and then gets eaten by sharks. The redhead swims 75 miles and then drowns. The blond swims 99 miles but got tired, so she swam back.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A Priest, a Rabbi and a Shaman walk into a bar. The Bartender looks at them and says "What is this a Joke?"

thumb_up thumb_down -15

patty was in sunday school, the teacher asked her "patty who created the universe?" john sliped into the seat next to her and jabbed her with a pen "LORD ALMIGHTY" the teacher said' good patty now who gave himself for us? john again jabbed her with a pin "JESUS CHRIST" "that very good patty now what did mary say to joseph after they had their 23 child?" john jabbed her " IF YOU STICK THAT DAMN THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME ILL BREAK IT IN HALF!!!" the teacher fainted

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q: You know what never gets old? A: The kids in a school shooting

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A black guy, a Jew and a Mexican walked into a bar...so I didn't....not because of their race but because I had already spent all of my money at the gay bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Whats the difference between a jew and firewood? Firewood is meant to be burned in a stove or firepit while jews are functioning members of society.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Friends are just like trees. They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q: How do you stop a black man from drowning? A: Quit peeing in his mouth.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's big long, harry, and has glowing eyes? I dont know. Its under my bed. PLEASE SEND HELP!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -15

an ethopian thanksgiving

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Women are only good for seventy-one things: Love A proper home to come home to everyday 69

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A witch walks into a bar and orders a drink. She gets her drink and proceeds to have a great time.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

All the kids at school we're playing soccer on a sunny day except Jenny, because she had a headache and didn't come to school that day

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the black man jump off of a bridge? -He was in depression and comitted suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do an onion and a hamster have in common? They are both in my Grandma's omelette.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A black man walks into a bar holding a weapon. He is asked to leave to leave because weapons are not allowed in the bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the jew ask for $10 back after he lent a boy $2? Because of inflation

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Whats brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

thumb_up thumb_down -15

* two sisters are making yo mama jokes* * mom turns around* mom: Hey yo mama so stupid ... sister one: ummmm.... sister two: sure thats not you?

thumb_up thumb_down -15

the man walk in to the shop and brought a pet nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q-What happens when you grow tomatoes in Kansas on an odd number year when its an average of 398degrees Kelvin ? A-You eat em

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did The white man loose his black friend? Because he ran away.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops