What was the blind man doing on the bridge? Getting struck by lightning.

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

What did one dead baby say to the other dead baby? Nothing, they are both dead.

A blond walked into a bar. A guy picker her up and then they had sex.

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. They order a few drinks, chat, and walk out.

roses are red, violets are blue, im a bad poet, text me. LMFAO

how do you have sex? i dont know im under age!

Why is Michael J. Fox so go at dance? Because he took lesson as a child

What does the fox say? Nothing a fox is incapable of speech.

Real Joke: The US Air Force operates Seymour Johnson Air Force Base. It is named for a seaman. Go look it up.

How do you get a dog to stop humping you? Pick him up and suck his dick.

Why did the black man steal the mountain bike? He didn't. He purchased and payed for the mountain bike.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra

There was a bunch of kids on a bus. One boy yelled "Look a squirrel!" Nobody saw it because he's dyslexic

why did the elephant cross the road? It was the chickens day off

What did the big Chimney say to the little Chimney? Nothing they are chimneys ....

What is the difference between a Ferrari and 1,000 babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

What is big, hard, and bushy? My Penis. I lied about it being bushy.

What did the black police officer say to the white police officer? We just got a call in. Four dead children were found in an alley behind a mall.

Welcome to the anti-joke Olympics! As you can see ladies and gentlemen, our contestants are starting to look very excited as the "who can look the most bored" competition is just about to begin! We are terribly sorry to announce that as for the butterfly style contest, all of the butterflies drowned :( While at this corner, we can see these contestants have been waiting patiently for hours for the "who is the most impatient" contest to begin! While over here, none of our contestants have yet to make a chicken cross the road and tell them why! In the meantime watch as we mistreat these Jews in order to find out what is worse, the holocaust or a worm in your apple! So far our contestants with worms in their apples are complaining more, but dying significantly less, how will this end! How exciting! Finally our swing contest has been cancelled as Sally refuses to get on it! Moral: BUT WILL IT BLEND!

A Mexican and an African American are in a car, who is driving? The Mexican, while the African American rides in the passenger seat.

Q. A man walks into a library and asks the librarian for a book on suicide? A. The librarian hands the man a book on suicide

Three black men was in a car. They were going on holiday.

Hazel and Gus are two teenagers who share an acerbic wit, a disdain for the conventional, and a love that sweeps them on a journey. Their relationship is all the more miraculous given that Hazel's other constant companion is an oxygen tank, Gus jokes about his prosthetic leg, and they met and fell in love at a cancer support group.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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