Roses are red Violets are blue Columbine was funny

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun. Get in the van

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Why did the girl talk to her computer? Because she was Skyping with some faraway friends. Why were her friends far away? She was sent to the moon. Why was she sent to the moon? Because she tried to create eternal night.

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What's up? Your time.

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In a joke book: So a man walks into a bar. Suddenlly the universe around the author crack. Unable to sustain the infinite potential of punchlines, the author tumbles through an empty void amongst shards of his broken reality.

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

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I dunno, I dont grade love, I want to see you, touch you, bang you (sorry for not having the guts to use a nicer word, but I am tired and that is what I have in me now) And while that makes me sound like some hippy, I am very fucking picky about who I spend time with, and when. And I got no male friends, waste of time, why spend time with guys when I can spend time with chicks. Excuse me, just need my meds, speaking of sincerity, yeah I use medications, wont tell you what, but its well, not for my "mental disorders" I was born crazy, and I am going to die like I live: INSANE.

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Why did Sally fall out of the tree? Because She had no arms or legs... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Knock-Knock? Who's There? Not Sally

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What do you have, if you have fists the can kill someone in one punch? Hulk's DNA

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A: Did you know that cashews come from a fruit? B: Not really. This is an interesting fact. Any other facts you have? A: yes ("A" was lying)

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whats the difference between me and callum ? one soul.

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why wouldn't the man's car work? because it was broken.

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what is the difference between a bucket of shit and a black person? the bucket the bucket

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Watch he thinks he can out wit me watch adams next joke it will suck sooooo bad

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When the sun goes down... Most of the guys pants goes down too. Just be straight XD

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What's the difference between a volleyball and a tree? They're both volleyballs except for the tree.

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What did the lighthouse say to the tree? Nothing because they are both unatimate objects and cannot speak

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what in the world is smarter than the world's smartest man? Nothing he is the smartest man.

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Your muma is so ugly she went to a ugly competition and got kicked out "no pros aloud".

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So a guy comes into a bar... And he is cited for public indecency.

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Who's dumb and retarted. A person that is dumb and retarted.

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All I can say is that its not the feds, and not Interpol nothing "legal" nor anything belonging to the state as far as we can tell. You all stay locked up, and I will make sure this little geek with shitty breath does not say anything about you, as for the rest, I cant say much.

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what did the orange say to the apple? hi

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Two muffins are in an oven. They say nothing, muffins are inanimate objects and therefore cannot talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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