A handicapped man walks into a bar...

Why did the pencil break? A Viking destroyed it with his beard.

What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It is not a sentient animal and is unaware of the dangers it will face.

Your legs are more open than my back door! Which is closed.

What is worse than waking up by your alarm clock on the weekend? 9/11

What did the homeless kid get for Christmas? Hypothermia.

What do an eagle and a off-white light bulb have in common? Nothing.

What happened when Glen jumped off a building? The rope snapped his neck. He died.

How do you make a twelve year old girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear.

What happened to the Jew who went to France? He had a very enjoyable time and visited many of the remarkable landmarks around the country.

Why did Bob fall off a cliff? He had an epileptic episode.

whats black, white, and red all over? your mum

Jack, John, Justin, Joseph and Jimmy walk into a bar. They order a pint of beer and start wondering what their names have in common.

I rode in to town on an ass... ur momas ass!!

Whats the diffrence between a white and a black guy? one of them is black

have you seen Helen Keller's bird house? neither has she

Have you heard of that new jewish car? No, have you? No.

Pete and repeat are in a boat. Pete kills him self due chronic depression. Repeat laughs his ass off

Twelve billion Nero, you puppy dog you hot blooded latino man. Why cant I control it myself?

Wuts brown and smelly? Brown smelly stuff.

guest who else is a ugly bitch my mom

I've got a great new 'Knock Knock Jock

So a dog walks into a bar.. well thats not true as most bars do not allow dogs.. oh..sorry.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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