How do you steal candy from a baby? You ask nicely.

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knock, knock! who's there? i don't know i don't know who niether do i...

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What happened when Susie fell off the Ferris Wheel? There was an open seat.

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What do you call a man with a limp? A limping man.

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ok when a fat person say he on a diet i said your on a sea food diet what evert you see you eat now get back to school John f kennedy students

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What's a good joke? France going to war and winning.

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What did the tramp get for Christmas? Nothing because he's Jewish.

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Do you know how I know you're gay? 'Cuz your dick taste like shit.

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Knock knock whose there alzheimers alzheimers who get in the van

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why did the computer monitor stop working? Becasue it has a date with a slice of cheese.

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Are you 9/11 because i would like you to destroy my tower.

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Q: Whats the difference between a Jew and a Boy-scout A: Boy-scouts come back from camp

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What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

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What did Timmy's mom think of his art project? Nothing, she screamed and called an ambulance because she saw that he had tripped and fallin onto a pair of scissors and they just so happened to peirce his heart.

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When does the Narwhal bacon? The Narwhal bacons at mid-night.

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Why is Bruce Wayne named Batman and Tim Drake named Robin? They wanted to hunt bats and robins whenever someone does something bad.

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Q: What's big, black, and smelly? A: The unemployment line.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because seven is a murdering sociopath

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cøck in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I want to get you pregnant.

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i wonder who made this website? a human

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What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs that gets stepped on a lot? Mat.

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

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What do you call a white man? A caucasian male.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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