Did you hear about the guy that told bad jokes? No.

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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What red and goes up and down? A tomato in an elevator.

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Why did the girl scream? She was being raped.

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A Muslim man gets onto a transatlantic airliner. All the other passengers are privately nervous, but no one mentions it.

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What does a grandmas vagina taste like? I don't know -- nor do I want to.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Fruit loops.

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A horse walks into a bar and Shits John Taffer is Pissed

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breasts

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What do communists and strawberries have in common? You can eat them.

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What does a shortstop do when the ball is by third base? He leaves the field to go to the hospital, his little sister just had a heart attack.

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Here's a riddle: What can you catch, but not throw? A really heavy ball, or STDs.

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wanna hear a clean joke? bob took a bath with bubbles. wanna hear a dirty joke? bubbles was a man :) i heard this somewhere and it made me laugh :)

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, and so do I.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

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Why is the sky blue? Because it is

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I would piss if alex berry had aids n died

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haha your power hose was robbed and the shitty bike

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why did the homeless man die? because everyone does.

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Why couldn't Timmy ride a bicycle? Because Timmy was a goldfish

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whats worse than a bee sting, two bee stings, whats worse than two bee stings, the holocaust, whats worse than the holocaust, tree bee stings...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was commiting suicide.

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What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I have ADD Check out this flashlight!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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