Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies on fire and a pile of living babies on fire? The dead babies are usually not as loud.

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A mormon walks into a bar.

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What happened when the Hispanic man dropped his Wollet? He picked it up

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What's worse then finding a worm in ur apple? Nothing it sucks and it's a waste of an apple

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What did the judge say to the criminal? I sentence you to a life time of solitary confinement.

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Two whales are in a bar. One says, "whoaohaoahwoahwahoh" The other says, "Go home, Frank. You're drunk."

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Did you hear the joke about the pencil? Nevermind it was pointless.

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What do you call a black man that is wearing a suit? Whatever his name happens to be

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Man- Where can I find a book on the holocaust Book keeper- Have you tried comedy? Man- no I havent Book keeper- good it won't be there

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How many babiess it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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You know what they say about people with big feet? Big shoes.

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why didn't the chicken cross the road... because it got hit by a truck

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Knock knock. Who's there? Cargo. Cargo who? Cargo beep beep.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

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Q:Why did Jimmy eat an apple? A:He was hungry.

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why couldnt the man dunk? because he was 3' 2" and a legal midget.

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What do you call a Mexican without any arms or legs? A bean.

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What were the pilots' of Malaysia Airlines Missing plane favourite programs? Lost...

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What is the difference between a goat? It can neither ride a bike.

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Why did the boy get hit by a bus? HE didn't. He watched where he was going.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead.

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What's worst than biting into an apple and finding a worm? The holoca- *the man hearing the joke then pulls out a desert eagle and shoots the man in the chest before finishing the joke then goes to jail for the rest of his life*

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What do you call a cat up a tree in a party hat? A cat up a tree with a party hat

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops