Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I felt like kicking something.

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What did the newborn get on it's birthday? A life

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Have you ever ate a donut? Yes I have. In fact, the donut I ate recently was fairly delicious.

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(Mortal Kombat Annihilation) Princess Kitana: "Mother, you're alive" Sindel: "Too bad you, will die" (Troll 2) "They're eating her. And then they're gonna me. Oh my gawwwwwwwwd." (The Room) Johnny: I did not hit her, it's not true! It's bullshitt! I did not hit her! [throws water bottle] Johnny: I did *not*. Oh hi, Mark. Mark: Oh, hey Johnny, what's up?

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A man walks into a Bar, and he gets kicked out because its an animal only bar no people allowed

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Why did Joe not cross the road? Because the Pedestrian Crossing light said not to.

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I'm not saying my mother-in-law is fat, because she is anorexic.

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What did the man with candy say to the little boy? I have Candy.

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A tiger walks into bar. He orders a drink and leaves. The tiger's name was Tony the tiger," It was just a man wearing a costume for the cereal company.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'who the f*ck let a horse in here, get it out now'.

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Q: Why was the little girl cowering in a closet in a corner. A: Because there was a murderer/rapist in her house with her oarents gone.

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What is the difference of The United States and 10 pounds of shit? Well,considering there are 50 united states,we would take 10 away from 50 for a total of 40. A very simple subtraction problem indeed.

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Why did the Elf stab the Gnome? Because I was on a bad acid trip.

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B==========D-------------------------- im pissin man! god!

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Three men went out for a night on the town, one had too much to drink and was forced to take a cab home.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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All the kids at school we're playing soccer on a sunny day except Jenny, because she had a headache and didn't come to school that day

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why did the boy fall to the ground? He was struck by lightning

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Q: What did Nala say to Simba during the stampede? A: Nothing. She was nowhere to be found during that scene.

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1 + 1 = 2 If it was equal to 11 the problem would be impossible

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Rosie are red velvet blue I made eggs just for you

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What did the orphan get for christmas........Cancer

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What's 2+2? Fish

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vitamin c

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops