If you have 12 apples and I have 12 ice cubes how many pancakes fit on a roof? Purple because aliens don't wear hats.

WHY IS THIS SENTENCE CAPITALIZED? BECAUSE CAPS LOCK IS ON.

What's five miles long and has an IQ of 40? A democrat parade.

Q:What does a wheel a triangle and a circle all have in common A:There all round, I lied about the triangle.

An epileptic man attends a rave.

What do you call an alligator wearing a vest? An extremely talented reptile.

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Your under arrest for drug trafficking and possession of illegal firearms. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say...

What do you call an Interlochen Arts Academy Student with no talent? A comparative artist

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, It's not my fault, I found you in a zoo!

Why is Bruce Wayne named Batman and Tim Drake named Robin? They wanted to hunt bats and robins whenever someone does something bad.

What is the difference between a dead baby and a bowling ball? You can't pick up a bowling ball with a pitchfork.

A woman with big boobs walks into a bar and gets raped

Why did the bird fall out of the sky? It had no wings.

Who is yellow and cant drive straight. A man dying of lukemia

How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

Roses are Red Violets are Blue In Soviet Russia Poem tells You -Ben

Pickle

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he needed to go home.

Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog.

Try not to laugh at this joke... Knock knock Who's there? Ha ha ha Ha ha ha who? I told you not to laugh

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Alzheimers, Cheese on toast.

Q. want to hear the biggest lie in the world ? A. sure A.I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service

Why was the mushroom invited to the party? It was because it was a mushroom costume party

Q: What is black and white, black and white, black and white? A: A Nun falling down the stairs.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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