Man walks into a hotel on Friday, Stays for three days and leaves on Friday. How is this possible? A. His horses name was Friday

What's the difference between a Jew and a Fire extinguisher? One puts out a fire the other one fuels it.

A Blonde walks into a bar. She is in an abusive relationship and drinking her pain away.

That's not mine! it's bigger and blacker! ...where have i heard this before?

why was the boy crying over his dog, his cat, and his bird? Cuz i raped them Wat about his pet hamster? I threw it at a wall

Why did Rachel fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Rachel.

I have read and agree to the Terms of Service

Why did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

If a man dies in China, Does anybody care?

Whats 2 Plus 2? God Just Solve It.

What's black and gets in trouble a lot? A dog with black fur that has not been well trained.

My teacher told me to so a report on women rights.....I turned in a blank sheet! ^.^

Robocop The Reboot reboot. Watch as The friendly robot named Murphy, is violently broken down by a horrible shower of water, the only means to save him is to transfer his data into a human. He awakens again as Robofriendlydude (starring Adam Sandler) as a robot learns to love, learns to share, learns to dance with children in this years Reboot of the classic love comedy Robocop. PG-3 "So good I could only watch five seconds of it" Rotten potatoes. 99 percent fresh. "Kill me with a chainsaw" Honest reviews. "AWESOME!" Dishonest reviews "Makes Twilight seem like the better lovestory" Everyone.

Why did the man lose the a race? 'Cause he has no legs

I love bacon therefor I love people who eat bacon execpt people who eat my bacon then I hate people who eat bacon

A guy killed his kids and wife Pokémon GO also exists

What is the difference between a Ferrari and a bag of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

Knock Knock Who's there? The Police The Police who? YOU'RE UNDER ARREST! GET DOWN ON THE FLOOR! NOW!

What do you get when you cross a pug and a beagle? A cross pug and a cross beagle.

Why did the 3 legged dog fall over? Because it was knocked over by a passing pedestrian.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm an expert on flowers.

Why did they black straight guy go into an all white gay bar....? Because he went to the wrong place.

Women outside of the kitchen.

A man walked in to a store and asked for four candles. The storeman brought some fork handles and placed them on the counter. The customer said "No... 'Four Candles' a rather amusing sketch performed by The Two Ronnies, a comedy double act in the 1970s."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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