I like my babies how I like my chips. Chopped up and in a bag.

Why don't you run over a black guy on a bike? Because It's probably your bike..

united we sit, cause we're fat

Why can't penguins fly? Because their wings are adapted to swim and not to fly

There are two blonds in a car, the driver to looks to the other blond (carelessly taking in her surroundings) They crash and the passenger is grusomely killed to the point of not being recognized and the driver later commits suicide from the guilt and pending law suit.

Two men meet at an office. One man says "why the long face?" Then other man says "I just had plastic surgery."

Whats the difference between an aboriginal and a deer? Nothing, infact they are quite similar, they have no house and smell like wild animals and jaywalk.

belly button

What's blue and looks just like water? Water.

Why is the earth round? Because God saw it was flat and thought "too flat lets turn it around" And all was good.

Two cows are standing on the top of North Pole and in a half-inch wind they're spanking a bottle of coconut jam. Suddenly two infrared gallopping fly past them. What's the consequence? That people shouldn't use freshly peeled lemoncakes on underwater cornfields.

Adam Claypool is a fag. and his mother sweats my cum. Now that we got that out of the way lets get to the jokes.

Fine, ladies first.

drugs sex and alchohole are yumme as AIDS

Whats long, green and falls out of trees? A canoe. Why did the old man fall out of the tree? He was in the canoe.

Justin Bieber walked into a strip club. Selena Gomez wasn't there.

What did the horse say to the farmer who tried to feed him hay soup? I don't like that.

What's faster than a Nascar Racecar? My thoughts. -Juanita

It's April Fools Day... APRIL FOOLS!!!

purple pickles

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's Where am I

what did hellen keller name her dog? answer: unnumnumnum

whats worse than ur granny dying? uhhh...actually theres nothing is worse

knock knock... who's there? uninterrupted cow uninterrupted cow who?? exactly....

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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