You are in a room with no doors and no windows. All you have a chainsaw and a mirror. How do you get out? You don't and will slowly die a painful death of asphyxiation.

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What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? Everything.

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Gorillas are black, Roses are red, Were out of milk, GET THE F**K OUT!

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What do a fish and a bird have in common? They both live under water. Apart from the bird.

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Why wouldnt you want to hit a black man that is on a bike with your car? It mite be your bike

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What's the difference between a gluten free cereal and a regular cereal? One has gluten, and one has no gluten.

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Thanks superman! Oh this is just what a regular Clark Kent would do... Uh... I mean... Dont worry Superman I know you arent Clark Kent, I just wonder why you work for him all day... Moral: What? What moral? What what?

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Q:What do you call a black priest? A: A great quality volunteer at a local church.

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A man in a state penitentiary drops his soap. He then picks it up and continues his shower.

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what do you call an animal thats black and white and red all over? an elephant

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What do friends and trees have in common? They will fall over if you hit them repeatedly with an axe.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding poo in your shoe.

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This is a joke.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are trapped on a deserted island when they come across a magic lamp. The brunette rubs the lamp and a genie appears! The genie offers them each a wish. They all make their wishes, but none of them come true as the genie was simply a hallucination brought on by severe trauma and dehydration.

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Doctor, doctor, I have a cavity! Go to the dentist.

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Roses are dead Violets are dead I'm a terrible gardener.

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Why did little Timmy fall off his bike? His pace maker failed.

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What's big and white and can't climb trees? A mattress

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Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bench? a bench is a structure designed for sitting and a Mexican is a person born in Mexico.

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Why did bethany fall off the swing She had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Bethany

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What did the man say when he found out he had cancer? Nothing. He was so in shock, that he later died from another type of cancer.

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Why 't the blonde dial 911? Because phones haven't had dials on them for at least 40 years or so. She can however punch it in on her keypad.

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[INSERT ANTIJOKE HERE]

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A horse walks into a bar and begins to moo. Everyone is confused until it takes off its costume and reveals it's just a cow.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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