Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why cant the blind man read brail? he has no fingers

thumb_up thumb_down -5

There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the black guy cross the road? Because he was late for a meeting

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his monthly car bill is too freaking high and can't afford to take car to work, where all of his co- workers are waiting to tease him!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A lot eh?

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What is the difference between a blond and a mummy? A blond has a brain.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why was billy bad at telling jokes? Billy was sexually abused as a child and humour was never really part of his life

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q: Why was jimmy's mom crying? A: Because her doctor said their were going to get rid of he cancer, 5 minutes later hey came back in and told her that he had made a mistake and that was for someone else, she was actually only had a month to live.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's funny about a car accident involving three children, a widow, and a dog? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A frog, duck, monkey and beaver each enter a bar being carried by a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. If your wondering, the redhead carried two animals.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the Zombie kill and eat a man? Because it was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the Asian say to the American? herro. rook at me. i have round eye i american!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Far from, yet all organizations are money based and put capitalism in front of all, so if lets say, one organization, needs help from another, a money transaction is made, I play a role there, as a well... Diplomat, its not my title, but my title is something I cannot reveal to anyone, not even my wife, id be putting myself and people in danger, but since I master things such as hypnosis, I can well, influence people, this is how I can pull of favors myself. Not favors such as "kill that guy for me", but more like... In your case. "If you are going to kill the wizard, please let the rest be, I know they are good people"

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse begins bucking wildly, injuring three patrons before breaking through the front door.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you get when a person and a cat try to have a child of some sort? Nothing because there chromosomes don't match, and there for physically impossible.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the chicken cross the road? Most likely for no discernible reason as chickens are animals with poor reasoning skills.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the man get a penis Becuse he was gay Add on He died

thumb_up thumb_down -5

osama bin ladin is dead. let's get a beer.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why wasn't the black kid allowed in the school? Because it was the Southern United States in the 1930s and due to racial tensions at the time most public facilities were seperated by race.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the black guy cross the road? His car was parked across the street.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A drunkard walked into a bar, and up to the bartender. He proceeded to **** the **** until he ******. I proceeded to break down in immense frustration over censorship.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Don't chop the dinosaur daddy! OK.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What is similar between a dog and a cat? They are both dogs except for the cat.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops