Why did the chicken cross the road? He was baked.

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What did the POW say to his captor? I do not want to be waterboarded.

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List of people I love: Hitler Stalin Mussolini Ted Bundy Charles Manson Hannibal Lecter Vladamir Putin Satan Justin Beiber One Direction Chris Brown Chris Brown's parents Oh, and my mother. I love my mother, too.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? He was mauled by a bear!

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A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

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what draws the line between sex and rape? a pen

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What happened when the child missed his school bus home? He had to take the long 6 mile walk back home and did not return until dinner time.

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Knock knock! Knock knock!! Knock knock!!! Knock knock!!!! WHOSE THERE! Wait its a woodpecker

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Why did the friendly not play outside? Because they were dead. Just like your dreams.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7.? Well 7 has suffered a tramatic brain injury, and has a tendancy to brutally attack anyone he comes in contact with. The whole situation is unfortunate.

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Q: what do you call a bunch of black people running down a hill? A: mudslide

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roses are grey violets are grey im color blind

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Why did the man jump off the bridge. Because he found his beloved wife cheating on him with his life-long friend that he meet when they both where in pre-school.

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How long does it take for light to travel a light-year ? A year.

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Q: What did the skeleton order when he walked into a bar? A: A beer and a mop.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzie!

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How do you make someone laugh? Tell them this joke.

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Q: Why did the man have sex with Amanda Seyfried? A: Are you kidding me?

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Knock knock. Who's there? John. Oh, OK I'll be there in a sec. *opens door* Did you bring the blender and the baking tray? Oh no I forgot I'll run back and get them.

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Science fact: what would happen if you lined up all the veins in your body? You would die.

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What does a blonde say when she wants to order a large pizza ? "Hi, I would like a large pizza, please."

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Why did the guy go to the strip club? To look at naked people.

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Why was Osama Bin Laden so hard to find? His hiding place was difficult to come across.

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Yo momma's so fat, that she got baptised in Sea World.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops