Q: why did the black guy die? A: he got shot

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Optimus Prime: "GIVE ME YOUR FACE!" Shockwave: "Illogical. I have no face." Optimus Prime: "Then GIVE ME YOUR EYE!" *RIPP*

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Why did the lemon eat salt? I DON'T KNOW!!

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Why did the black guy sing? Cause he can sdf sdfsd f sdf ds f sd fsd f sd f ds g sdfgh fsh sdf h dfsg dfs g df gdfgdf g d yeah thats right

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How do you get a slave to stop screaming from the rope he is hanging on? You stop messing around and you hang him already!

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What do a blonde and a door knob have in common? Everybody gets a turn

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Why did the gay guy go in the bar? To find some hookers

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Steve" "Oh hey Steve, come on in"

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What did the Muslim say to the American? Hi

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there are seven of us," reply the babies, "now get us a round of bloody marys

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How do you know a black person is in your house? You see him in your house.

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An astronaut walks into a bar. He orders a beer. After waiting for about 1 and a half minutes he receives his beer. The bartender says it was 3 dollars. The astronaut checks his wallet and finds no money so he pays with credit card. The bartender swipes his credit card but the card doesn't work. So the astronaut takes out his debit card. When the bartender swipes the debit card it worked. In relief the astronaut looks at the bartender and says "Thank you" and then goes home.

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What do you call a person in a morgue? Dead.

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How many apples do you end up with if your dog is a golden retriever who got raped by a giant scorpion? A jail

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What do you get when you stab Al with a sword? At

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What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

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Why did the jew go into the gas chamber? Because he thought he was going to get a shower.

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Jokes=Funny Anti=Opposite Anti+Joke=Anti Joke Anti Joke= Anti Humour Anti Humour + People= Offensive Jokes Offensive Jokes= Often jokes about women Offensive Jokes=Problems Women=Problems

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Wha do you call a couple with aids? 2 pepole who need immediate health treatment.

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Tilt your screen back .

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How do you kill a retard? Give him a knife and say "who's special?"

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My heart is in my hands. Call an ambulance.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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I was on Skype with a girl yesterday and she asked "Do you want to see something?" "No," I said "my mom's in the room and she might get a bad interpretation." "I really want you to see this." She said. " No, my mom's still in the room, she'll think I'm weird if you turn out the lights." "Darn I really wanted to see your glow in the dark snuggie."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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