5 little monkeys jumping on the bed, one fell off and bumped his head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said, "He has a mild concussion."

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Q: What did the Catholic man say in response to the gay man asking what he likes to do? A: golf

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Roses are red Violets are blue and oranges are orange nothing rhymes with orange

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what's worse than people who aren't funny? ryan vallee

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why can't Michael Jackson bake a pie???? Because he's dead

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knok knok whos there know one cares your gay

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whats worse than 100 babies strapped to an atomic bomb? 1 baby strapped to 100 atomic bombs

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A man walks into a bar. Oh, wait, no. It was a horse. So... A man walks into a horse

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What did the hedgehog say to the beaver? Nothing, they can't talk.

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Why was little Mat petting his dog? Just kidding his dog died in a house fire... so did little Mat

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What do you say to two cows? Hey cows.

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A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken a month off from working in their law firm. The mexican man, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. Alex, however never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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sally has no arms knock knock who's there not sally

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Rose's are red, violets are red, trees are red, bushes are red, oh God the garden's on fire.

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Why do Asian Women have small boobs? Because anything under A is unacceptable.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Very, very hungry.

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What did the man with no arms say to the jewish man? I have no arms.

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When birds fly south for the winter they fly in a V formation. one side is always longer than the other. why is that? Because there are more birds on that side

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Fun fact: Steel wool comes from the fleeces of iron sheep.

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Why was the Asian terrible at driving? He was drunk.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock "Who's there?" Not Sally!

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wanna hear a joke? womans rights

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how do you prevent a chicken from contracting aids?? you make him a little chicken condom.

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Q: How much old could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck Wood A:10.6 cubic metes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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