Why did the squirrel fall out of a tree? It was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of a tree? It was cruelly stapled to the first one.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she has no arms

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A homeless guy gets done with his daily work. where does he go? nowhere he is homeless...

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A dog got into a gingerbread house. She ate some and brought some to the basement it got on the couch!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why didn't the plane crash... because of the wight male piloting it

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the chicken cross the road? Orange ya glad i didn't say banana

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What would Michael Jackson do if he were in a room full of kids? Nothing, he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

whats sad about a ton of blacks in a limo going off a cliff. they'll destroy the car

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the chicken cross the road? Peer pressure

thumb_up thumb_down +9

My wife came up to me and said, "I want you to make me scream with 2 fingers!" So I poked her in the eyes!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did the farmer say to the other farmer? We are both farmers.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Bläeghen-Fassybìll-No?cheb!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A Redhead, a Blonde, and a Brunette are all standing on top of a cliff in Ireland. They took a few pictures, and all in all it was a lovely vacation.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

You ask your friend if they want to hear a joke when they say yes tell them that thought you had a joke

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why Johnny's parents threw out his broken bike? - ´Cause Johnny got hitted by a drunken driver and died last week, when he was cycling to school.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

how do you know when an elephant been in your refridgrator The door wont close

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only one, but he may forget to finish the task due to his Alzheimer's.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's worse than an ice cream cone falling over? The Holocaust. What's worse than that? Two ice cream cones falling over.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Your Mother

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Barack Obama is a good president.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did the man say while he was in surgery? Nothing, he was in surgery.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Knock Knock. Who's there? A Jehovah's witness.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why didn't Jimmy go to school? Because Jimmy is a brick wall.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops