My friend thought that an onion was the only food that could make you cry, so I threw a watermelon at his face.

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What happen to the man who got drunk and passed out behind the wheel? He crashed into a tree, his car caught fire and then he got incinerated.

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What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? Well, contrary to popular belief, it is NOT Master Pain's (Betty's) "butt". You would most likely get a bungee jumping owl.

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2 guys walk into a bar but the third one has known about what happens to the third guy but since he is reading this in a newspaper and his unaware of his surroundings he walks into the bar anyway and feels very foolish.

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Why can't white kids say the "F" word? Because they'll get soap in their mouths Why can't black kids say the "F" word? Because they'll get a beating until their butts turn black and blue and they'll start crying in pain

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What do you call a man with a spade in his head? ...An innocent, family orientated murder victim.  X

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Why was the girl's clitoris cut off? Her country practiced Sharia Law.

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Asian: what time is it? other person: time for you to open your eyes.

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What's worse than fingering your sister and finding your father's wedding ring ? 3 bee stings.

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Neutron walks into a bar and orders a drink. It never receives it because it can't talk and is far too small to see.

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What's worse than being fat? Being gay

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Q: How did Helen Keller cross the street? A: She walked.

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You know what's natural? Bears.

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the firefighter says to the other firefighter: hey firefighter, are we going to fight a fire?

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police The police who? Sir, your wife is dead.

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A blonde and a brunette jump off a building, who hits the ground first? The one that jumped first

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Why couldnt the man stop the car rolling down the hill? Because he had no legs.

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Golgo12 here, I can see how some people consider you insane Nero, glad to know point zero is the starting ground of your elysum, that should show them how a modern society should be like. You got six years left to live? That sucks man sorry to hear that. Ur real name is Nero? Axel Knight sounds so much more... You.

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a irish man walks past a bar

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Why is this the best day of 10 year old Johnny's life? His parents were killed in 9/11, and Osama Bin Laden has been found and killed. What, Too soon?

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Q: why did the prisoner drop his soap? A: easy sex

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What's more fun than throwing a dead baby off a cliff? Go-carts

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Why did lil' Jenny fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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What do you call a man with leaves on his head? Steve, he's on camouflage training in the Army.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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