Knock Knock Whose there? The pizza you ordered That's weird, the Pizza I ordered shouldn't be able to talk

What was Joe's old name? Joe, I lied about the old part.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? I don't know, I've never tried to.

What's red bubbly and spins around? A baby in a microwave

Two men walk in to a bar. The first man says "I'll have some H20" The second man says "I'll have some H20, too." They both received glasses of water.

Why do ducks fly south for the winter? because its to far to waddle

How do you stop an ice cream headache? Run in front of a bus.

My therapist says that I have a preoccupation with vengeance. We'll see about that!

what do u call a blonde in the libary? alexandra wallace

Knock Knock Who's there Kevin Kevin who Kevin your friend dumbass

what is this joke about? - i don't know i am still writing the j

Why is NO ONE on Facebook when I AM?! Because you have no friends... on Facebook... ... Wow.

Q. Why are most jews unemployed? A. They all got fired.

monkeys that understand what people say dont understand what people say because they understand CC

What happends when two gay guys want to have kids? They can't, so they go to an orphanage and adopt one.

whats sad about a ton of blacks in a limo going off a cliff. they'll destroy the car

Why did Jimmy not go to school? Because Jimmy, along with his family, were killed in a horrible house fire. Knock Knock? Who's there? Not Jimmy...

2 blondes walk into bolemics anonymous.

So a man walks into a bar... ouch

How do Yankees fans cheer for their favorite sports team? Let's go Yankees!

How many dead rats can you put in your ex-girlfriend's bed? 437.

Whats brown and sticky? A stick.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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