"Never trust what the internet says." - Abraham Lincoln

What is red and green and goes 50mph? A frog in a blender

What's the difference between a dead Blackman in the road and a dead dog in the road? There's skid marks in front of the dog.

What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown costume

Knock knock. Who's there? Hi. Hi Who? Hi who?! Hi Ho Hi HO. Its off to work we go!! umm.

If you have 5 bucks and Chuck Norris has 5 buck you both have 5 bucks

How did the mexican die while fixing a lightbulb? He fell off the ladder.

So the man goes to the doctor and the doctor tells the man " you will have to quit masturbating " So the man asks " why" And the doctor said " so I can examine you "

Q: When you have alot of hair, what are you? A: Obease

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side which would be a incontrovertible (obvious) decision.

Guess what I was with your mom last night so I wraped her in foil and put her in the oven.

Why couldn't the girl eat her pizza? She had no face.

What is the difference between a clown and a dead baby? One makes you laugh and one is just a clown.

If Chuck Norris was really so awesome he would come and slam my head into the keyboard.

What is worse than seeing a pile of dead minorities? Dropping a dollar.

what do you call a dead arab? a suicide bomber

Whats brown and smells bad poo

So the question i got asked in order to post this was: Which one is easiest? and I thought to myself, the slutty one, obviously!!

Q: Why does a zebra have stripes? A: Because Sarah Jessica Parker is a horse.

Why did Jane get pregnant Because she bought a man's semen and put it in her vagina.

Oracle horacle, you big bloated boracle!

Two penguins, sitting in a bath tub. One says, "Pass the soap!" The other says, "What do you think I am?! A clock?"

guess what im a bitch i have no balls and i can slap your mum in the face

Why did the clock say 10:30? It was a digital clock!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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