Q. Why are most jews unemployed? A. They all got fired.

What do a squirrel and a cigarette have in common? -They are both perfectly harmless until you stick them in your mouth and light them on fire.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?? It got shot Why did the 2nd monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey

What would you call the jetsons if they were black? Niggers

What's black, white, and red all over? An African American and Caucasian man painting a house with red paint and accidentally spilling some on themselves

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? I don't know, I've never tried to.

Q: How many nuns does it take to eat a dead racoon? A: 2

What did Helen Keller name her dog? She didn't, her father named the dog because he was aware of his daughters innability to speak.

What do you call a black man with a peg leg? Disabled

what do you call a shitty anti-joke? A shitty anti-joke.

What does a sailboad and a walrus have in common? Nothing.

What is just as important as Woman's Rights? Woman's Lefts, to maintain equality.

Why did the man fall off his bike? He ran into a pile of dead babies.

Chuck Norris tried to return some jeans to Target and when they didn't give him his money he kickeed them in the face.

This made my day: The Japanese verb "to drink" is "nomimasu". [L]

Two peanuts were walking down the road. One was assaulted because they were walking in Detroit.

Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could walk into the mall and kill hundreds of innocent lives and leave thousands wounded.

What happened when the man got into the taxi? The driver shot him 17 times in the chest and ran away

What do you get when you cross a dog and a school bus? A dog and a school bus are not sexually compatible and therefore they cannot reproduce.

Roses are red, but there are also pink, white and yellow varieties Violets aren't blue, they're violet, hence the name I've got OCD And my poetry skills are also lacking.

Terry has ebola

roses are red violets are blue you smell like poo I F*****G HATE YOU!

Why are black people so good at basketball? they can SHOOT, STEAL and RUN.

why did Michael Jackson cross the road? He didnt he is dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...