Two muffins are in the oven They didn't say anything.

How did the blonde die raking leaves? She fell out of the tree!

How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself pink and throw green banana at her.

Chris Bosh's neck

What happens when a black guy jumps you? Well its no diffrent to when anyone else jumps you!

What's the meaning of life? I don't know.

What do you call it when a plane crashes into a school? A terrible accident.

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

Q: Whats black and white and red all over? A: I am unsure for I am color blind.

Juan got hit by a truck Knock Knock Who's there? Juan's brother coming to stab you in the abdomen.

what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? when people don't understand the concept of anti-jokes and post real jokes

I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

what did the teacher say to his student? do your work.

Knock Knock Hold on Im pooping.

How many black people does it take to change a light bulb? one, its a fairly easy task

When A Shouty Man Goes Into His House. His Sister Nearly Kills Him So When A Shouty Man Goes Into A Library. The Books Try To Kill Him.

Robert Mugabe.

Why did the little boy fall of his bicycle? It was the first time he road without his training wheels.

What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Given the unlikely circumstance in which an elephant actually does sit on your fence, it is equally unlikely said elephant would be able to do so unseen by witnesses, of whom you may ask what time the event occurred. Assuming your witness thought to look at the time befor calling animal control.

Why did the chicken cross the road? She had no purpose.

A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. One rainy night an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them out for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

A duck walks into a 7-11 and says "Give me some Chap-stick, and put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because, as all people know, ducks cannot speak. However, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting a prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need Chap-stick anyway, since he has no lips.

What did the white man say to the black man that was very interested in the story he had to tell? Cool Story bro, tell it again!

Parent: Please, my son have sinned. Please cleanse him from his sins. Priest: Hmmm, it may be hard to cleanse him from his demons. You may leave him in my car today. We shall enter the dark chambers where we will battle your demons Parent: Thankyou Priest: Alone, in the dark. It will be painful for him, but he shall be cleansed *wink* Parent: whut?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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