Why did the Chinese Arab buy blue paint? He already had red in his basement.

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Why did the man Jump of a bridge? Because he got sick of his life and he wanted to die.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your pork? Finding half of a worm, because the worm you just ate is going to live in your stomach, breed, then come out your butt. Or the Apocalypse.

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Q: What does Chinese look like? A:Chinese

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Hey i just met you. and this is crazy. I sent you my pubes in an envelope.

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So there were these two ovens in a muffin. One oven said "Holy fuck it's muffiny in here." The other oven said "Holy fuck a talking oven!"

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I don't usually drink beer, but when I do it usually doesn't take much for me to feel the effects of intoxication.

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What do you do if you are surrounded by 2000 Hungry cannibals? You talk to them in a calm yet determined diplomatic voice, then you become a part of them. Moral: A part of them... Forever.

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Why Are Parking Lines White? - So You Can See Them...

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A Fat person walks out of mcDonalds

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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What did the bartender say when the black man walked into the bar? Hello, what would you like to drink?

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Knock knock Whos there Your Ma Your Ma who Your ma's in jail!!!

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Knock knock? Whose There? Not Suzie, She can't knock

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Two Pigs are in a bath. One pig says to the other "pass me the soap", to which the other pig replies "Do I look like a typewriter?"

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What's the worst part about anti jokes? They get boring after a while

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what is brown and wet? Muddy water

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Q: When you have alot of hair, what are you? A: Obease

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How do you make an idiot in suspense?

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Roses Are Blue I Have A Gun And Ill Sout You!

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What did the shy guy say at the speech? Nothing

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How many Jews can you fit in a one-person car? --One in the drivers seat, 30 million in the ashtray

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Is it a bird, is it a plane?! No it's.... It's a bird.

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There were two blondes going to California for the summer, they are about two hours into the flight and the pilot gets on the intercom and says we just lost an engine but it is all right we have three more but it will take us an hour longer. A half hour later he gets on the intercom again and says we just lost another engine but its all right we have two more it will take us another half hour though. One of the blondes says "If we lose the two last engines we will be up here all day"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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