Who can walk on water? Not the guy in the wheelchair.

Penis chickens

What is red and has wheels? Grass, I lied about it being red and having wheels.

charly ate an apple. the apple was filled with poison and charly died.

can you touch your toes? no

Your momma's so not fat that when a school bus rolled by here house, she just sat there and turned on oprah.

You know what the Germans have to say about problems? For every problem there is a final solution.

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding Osama Bin Ladan in your refrigerator.

Roses are red Violets are blue I am staraiL so dont touch me!!!!!

cancer isn't that good for you. so try not to get it

Cyrus: Can you dig it?! Phil: I can feel it calling in the air tonite……..oh lord

Three dogs start a club called the Holly Place Exclusive Dog Club. The Club Motto is, "You can't be in our club. Just us. Read the sign. It says "Exclusive". How is that confusing? Get away from here. Now."

I can't hear you. I have carrots in my ears.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, My family is dead

What does aaron eat for dinner Answer- Fat Finger HAHAHAHAHA

What has seven legs and cant walk? A paraplegic, and I lied about five of those legs.

How many people does it take to screw in a light bulb? To get to the other side

What's the difference between Chuck Norris and Bigfoot? Nothing. Their both really hairy.

What's in a bag of dead babies? Dead babies and one alive baby eating it's way out.

Why did the deer cross the road? It didn't, the animal species is incapable of having a logical reason to possessing the will to cross a road. ruhtard

What did the monster under the bed say to another monster? I have the odd feeling that someone is on top of the bed.........

One muffin says to the other muffin "it sure is hot in here." the other muffin replies "you know, technically, we're not muffins because we're not done cooking yet."

Reilly and Ross went up to fetch a pale of water when a triceratops turned them into bagels then ate them and later crapped them out....

1: I heard a great knock knock joke, but you have to start it. 2: Okay, knock knock! 1: Who's there? 2: ???

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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