Q. What did the pedophile get when he went to jail? A. Exactly what he wanted.

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Why are Asians such bad drivers? They're not: it is a racist stereotype that is propagated by people who are so insecure that they must put others down to feel good about themselves.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You're parents are dead All your friends are too

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Where did Betsy go after the explosion? Everywhere

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? because she's a woman

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

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I would tell you a joke but I'm not funny

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Why did the black cop pull the white guy over? He was going approximately 52 miles per hour on a 40 miles per hour speed limited road.

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Why was Hellen Keller blind and deaf? Because she was a girl.

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If a tree falls on a woman, and no one is around to hear it, what is a tree doing in the kitchen?

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A man walks into a bar with an octopus. He tells the bartender that his octopus can play any instrument. The bartender gives the octopus bag pipes. The octopus fiddles with the bag pipes but can't seem to play them. The man gives the bag pipes back to the bartender and leaves with his octopus. He is quite embarassed and decided to get bagpipe lessons for his octopus.

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What should you give your Italian plumber for a refreshment? Water, because he's probably working so hard that he's thirsty.

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Q:What do you call chocolate without a gag reflex? A: Choc-o-late (Choke a lot)

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You read this in school as the kid sitting next to you stares at his computer screen.

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There are only three kind of people: people who can count and people that can't count

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whats worse than a paper cut? getting your head chopped off

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Yo mama so fat she makes blind kids cry

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Interrupting Doctor" "Interrupting Doc-" "You have Cancer'

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What's the difference between a ghost and a dolphin? A ghost isn't a dolphin.

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her with a knife.

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What do you call a black mailman? By his name.

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Why can't black people be astronauts? Institutionalized racism.

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Q: how do u wake lady gaga up? A: you poke-poke poke her face.

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Ben." Ben who?" "Ben Dover!" "Ben,it's been 7 years. I already moved on and have a new husband and family. Stop coming here or I'm calling the police."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops