Why did the woman accuse a black man of stealing from a bank? Because she was eating a cornmuffin on the bench across the street when she saw a black man,stealing money from a bank

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Dear paranoid people who check behind their shower curtains for murderers, If you do find one, what`s your plan?

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do you say to a jew with blood on his leg? Are you okay?

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Roses are red violets are red bushes are red oh shit my garden is on fire

thumb_up thumb_down +24

WILLYS

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Black People

thumb_up thumb_down +24

I hated hipsters before hating hipsters was mainstream. Does that make it sound like I have a fixed gear bicycle? Because I don't... I promise... What's a fixed gear bicycle, you ask? You mean you don't know???

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What did the girl with two broken legs give her parents for Christmas? Medical bills.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

whats the difference between a bird and a turtle? they can both fly but the turtle cant

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Who's the best German Chef? Hitler

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do you call a prostitute with morals? Ironic.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the chicken cross the road? He felt like crossing roads that day.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did Timmy fall down the stairs Because he is blind and I pushed him

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A duck, a rabbi, a homosexual, and the president walk into a bar. As a result, bruises appeared on their foreheads.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

How many lemurs does it take to paint a wall It depends on how hard you throw them Why did Jane fall off the swing She has no arms Why did Jack drop his ice cream cone He got hit by a bus Did you know that if you pretend to eat salt you can actualy taste it Do this in public. Why was 6 afraid of 7 Numbers can't think This is the original anti joke A man walked into a bar he is an alcoholic and is distroying his family. Fin a penny pick it up and all the day you will have good luck Until you get hit with a car door. A man is SCUBA diving when he is almost out of air so he takes one breath an holds it to the surface The trip is so long that his lungs explode do to a change in pressure so he died.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

did you know towels can cause dry skin?

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

what did the duck with roller skates say to the camel? how are the wife and kids?

thumb_up thumb_down +22

When did joseph the deer learn to fly? - Never, deer can't fly

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Whats worst than reading the 8th anti joke that ends with the Holocaust? The one where it ends with someone getting hit by a fridge for the 9th time.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

You smell just like a black person. With your nose.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Did you here about the Asian couple who had a stupid baby? They named him Sum Ting Wong

thumb_up thumb_down +22

How do you get a clown off of your property? You ask him politely to get off and if he doesn't, you should contact the authorities immediately.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops