I don't usually drink beer, but when I do it usually doesn't take much for me to feel the effects of intoxication.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Hey i just met you. and this is crazy. I sent you my pubes in an envelope.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why Are Parking Lines White? - So You Can See Them...

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What's worst than your computer breaking? Your face

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Stop. Seriously stop.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

roses are red , thankyou for stating that , i can now continue with gardening as it is my profession.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

a dedicated fat guy joins a kung fu dojo he is asked to dedicate his like to his kung fu the fat man dose not he is already dedicated to being a fat guy

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why did the man crossing the busy road die? because he wanted to

thumb_up thumb_down -28

How do you call the uncle who molested you as a child? More than likely with a telephone.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Read a Book.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

want to get screwed for four years? VOTE REFUGLYCAN!

thumb_up thumb_down -28

why did the chicken cross the road? because it felt like it!

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Wanna hear a joke? that disabled guy who wants to climb mount everest.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

roses are gray, violets are gray, Im a dog

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why was six afraid of seven? It wasn't. A number is a mathematical object used to count and measure.It is not a living thing and therefore does not possess thoughts and feelings.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why did the skeleton not go to the party? Because without the aid of various ligaments and muscles that would be attached to the average human being's skeleton, he was not able to move himself so much as an inch.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

How can you treble the value of any Skoda car? Ensure its paintwork, upholstary, floor, lights, wipers, steering wheel, brake, horn, CD player, radio and clutch are clean and/or sound; fill its petrol tank, oil, brake and winscreen wiper fluid reserves; fit a roof rack; include a red triangle, a fire extinguisher, a blanket and a first aid kit in the sale; take out comprehensive insurance and pay a year's road tax and MOT before selling it.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

There were two blondes going to California for the summer, they are about two hours into the flight and the pilot gets on the intercom and says we just lost an engine but it is all right we have three more but it will take us an hour longer. A half hour later he gets on the intercom again and says we just lost another engine but its all right we have two more it will take us another half hour though. One of the blondes says "If we lose the two last engines we will be up here all day"

thumb_up thumb_down -30

How many Jews can you fit in a one-person car? --One in the drivers seat, 30 million in the ashtray

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What do you get when two chickens cross a road? -Salmonella stricken hobos

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Is it a bird, is it a plane?! No it's.... It's a bird.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. His family is struggling financially and his children are severely malnourished. If he wasn't an alcoholic, he could afford healthcare for his family and move into a better neighborhood. But he's not, so they will die a long, painful death.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What's brown, black, and red all over? The burning cross on the lawn of a respectable African-American family.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops