Q. Whats brown and sticky? A. Poo

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How many Mexicans does it take to cross the border? Don't answer, just think and laugh.

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Canadians

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what do you get when you cross a dinosaur and a spaceship? a dinosaur spaceship

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him what he would like. The man says,"I'm feeling light today so I'll just have some H2O." The man's friend says,"I'm feeling the same. I'll have some H2O, too." The second man died.

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how many couples does it take to screw in a light bulb. 1 the wife to go buy the light bulb and the husbend to put it in.

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Why did Johnny close the door on Sally's face? Because Johnny is a dick.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting stabbed.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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What's green, [ THIS BIG ] and flies around the room... A remote controlled gherkin!

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How do you make a great cake? Bett Crocker books

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What if someone sold your socks to a Jew? I would blackflip through the air and shit on his chest.

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Where did the two Jews ride when they got married? In the back of the oven.

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Knock, knock -The door's open.

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What is the difference between England and yogurt? One is a Western-European country and the other is a dairy product.

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Why did suzie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not suzie!!

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Why did the vulture cross the road? To get to the pile of dead babies left over from the Holocaust.

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Several ways to annoy people: Grab the end of their shirt to blow your nose Try to shove a bowling ball down there throat Try to sell them a broom and vacuum Try to eat their babies paint their toe Nibble their ankles Ask if you can babysit their crystal and if they say no start whining Carry around your chicken and ask if they want a nugget

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Whats the difference between 2 white men? They both have different jobs and one is racist orange peel.

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a man walks into a bar with a poodle stuffed halfway up his rectum... WHY ARE YOU WAITING FOR A PUNCHLINE!? MY GOD! THIS MAN HAS A DOG UP HIS ANUS!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt, it got stuck at a red light, it waited 5 minutes before getting frustrated and leaving. Later that day the chicken realized that it had forgotten to press the button.

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A dog walks into a bar and orders a pint of beer The barman replies : Woof Woof

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hers a joke... japanese people

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Why can't the toucann fly anymore? Because they're extinct

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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