What has 4 legs in the morning, 2 legs at noon, and 3 legs in the afternoon? A dog that got its hind legs chopped off, and then only got 1 prosthetic one.

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Never go into your parents room with a blacklight.. -Ryan Vallee

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Once upon a time there was a cowboy. He died. The end.

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I once did something.

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good morning. good day. good night. good to see you santa

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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A ginger man ascends to heaven and reaches the pearly gates, seconds later he wakes up in a hospital bed and realizes it was merely a near death hallucination and God isn't real.

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Why did the squirrel across the river upside down? So it could keep its nuts dry.

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Yo' mamma's so poor she's homeless and dying of starvation.

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Your momma's so fat: She fears a lower life expectancy and consequently not seeing her grandchildren grow up.

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Why did john have to have back surgery He needed his back "screwed" up

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Did you hear about the guy who got run over? Me neither

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What do you call an attractive woman in a blender? A very rare occurrence.

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Twelve men walk into a bar, and get stuck in the door because it's far too small for all of them to walk through at the same time.

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What did robin say to batman before they got I the car........ Get in the car.

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Did you hear the one about the bus driver? Me neither

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What did Santa say to his elf? Nothing. Santa isn't real. Elves aren't either for that matter.

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what do you get if you cross a scotsman , who knows nothing about football and a indian? Blackburn rovers, and a good night out

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Knock Knock. Who's there? A cannibal. What? You are about to die and be eaten. Asshole! i will murder you first!

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An Asian man fails a math test

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Q. How do you make your dog stop barking? A. Take it to the grocery store. Replace it with any popsicle in the fridge.

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What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

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why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a rapist

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? She was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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