A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

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Roses are red Violets are blue Get in the shed I'm gonna screw you

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One day Jesus said to John, " come forth and recieve everlasting life." Sadly John came in fifth and won a toaster.

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Person 1: Why does food from Subway taste so good? Person 2: I don't know, why? Person 1: Because their ingredients are fresh. Person 2: Um, OK? Person 1: Yeah, it's all under 18. Person 2: Shit...

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why did the chicken cross the road? it didnt it got hit by a bus.

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What's green and frolics in the forest? A flock of cucumbers.

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Question: So, what do you get if you put a live dog, a dead cat, some sugarcubes, and your sisters panties (HORMONES OKAY? EVERYBODY KNOWS HORMONES EQUALS SPICE! Or something anyways...) In a blender until its all red and squishy? The hell I know, but put some Redbull in it, and its fucking delicious!

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If the goverment wants us to be eco friendly then why are the eco friendly cars so expensive?

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Why are fish so easy to weigh? Because usually they've been killed, stunned or sedated first.

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Where did the kid go when the bomb exploded? Everywhere

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Why did the fat man fall off the swing? Because he weighed 855 pounds and it broke.

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ecks! why zee?

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hi mom

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Whites black white and red all over? The nazi flag.

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Q: Why does it take three Polacks to change a light bulb? A: Because they're so damn stupid.

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What did the black boy get for Christmas? Black people don't celebrate Christmas.

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what's a fish with no eyes and out of water? its just a fish

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why did the older man give candy to the little kids? he was in a parade

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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jd and zach loves vigina

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what duz 69 mean? its a number duhhhhhhh

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What is an offensive term to refer to black people who lived in the time of the Flintstones? n*ggers

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"knock knock" "who's there" "I dont know, check the door"

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How does a guy with no arms kill himself? It's called murder.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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