Why did Alex fall off the swing? he had no arms

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what did the bartender say to the customer? a. is it the first option b. is it the second option c. is it the third option.

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why do prostitutes do what they do? Because they have abusive fathers who always used them as sex slaves as children

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100 chefs walk into a bar

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one of my best friends is blind and hasn't been able to see anything hhis entire life but he can hear a hummingbird from 50 yards away i mean, talk about worthless..

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YO MAMMA SO SKINNY SHE HULA-HOOP THIER A CHEERIO

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What do you do when you're surrounded by 15 vampires and 15 werewolves? Stop pretending.

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why were the girls confused? they were in a logic class and couldn't seem to find the irrationality chapter in the book

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Nope, I mean you can try, but my phone is busted and the code on the chip my galpal here managed to finally get into the cell, has sixteen digits so damn small that none of us can read it,

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why do we have school? 2 learn duh y r u even askin? ur STOOPIDE!

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You mean I have to type in this little box? That's so embarrassing!

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination" and then he was resuscitated and became an atheist.

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Goodbye to the people who hated on me.

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i don't hate you because your fat ...your fat because i hate you

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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hey I just met you and this is crazy but get in my van

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theres this guy that i REALLY like but today he was putting something in my locker, it was gumbie the little green bendy thing but i didnt want it to be in my locker so i slammed my locker, except the only thing was that his pinky was in the way!!!! oh gosh i felt soooooo bad!!!! turns out he went to the hostpital and got stitches!!!!!!! that made it worse on me!!!!!! he said he was finee but i still cant let that go!!!!!

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When life gives you lemons.... Don't eat them, because you're probable hallucinating, and you don't know where they came from.

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My favorite color is Ham. And I can count to Potato.

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How many moms does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. They make you do it!

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Why did Susie fell off the swings? Because she didn't have any arms or legs.

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daughter and boyfriend havin sex baby baby baby ohhh!! mum walks in; what you doin signin to justin bieber,oh ok just make sure you dont sing to his song its crap!!!!!!!

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why did the clown cross the road? to kill everyone in the dark knight midnight premiere

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If this becomes top-viewed I will post more milk related jokes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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