Roses are Roses Violets are Violets I am to Literal, That is a statement.

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar and the bartender says, " OH MY GOD! YOU CAN WALK?!?!"

Red are roses, blue are violets I'm dislexic.

what do you call a man with a bullet hole in his leg? A man who needs t see a doctor.

An elderly man farts during Sunday morning mass. The children around him laugh and then their parents remind them to be respectful.

Why did the clown want a new bike? Don't ask me, clowns are allowed to want things too

Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a serial killer.

how do you kill a bird? tie it to a tree throw a wasp nest at it and run the tree over with a semi filled with manure

sweating like antoni with a girl

A man walked into a bar. He then sat down and ordered a drink.

Hi! Do you know how much a polar bear weighs? Roughly 1150 pounds if a full grow male.

Your momas so fat her doctor put her on a diet plan.

Why Cant michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he is dying of Parkinson's disease.

What do you call a black man wearing tights? Rick

What's the difference between a Lamborgini and 100 dead babies? I don't have a Lambo in my garage.

Why were my arms so tired after I flew in from the coast? Because the stewardess, god rest her soul, failed to latch the door securely.

What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

Irish sobriety

What's worse than the Holocaust? • • • Stubbing your toe.

Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme But this one doesnt

How many lawyers does it take to screw in a lightbulb One because lawyers are usually well educated and know how to screw in a lightbulb

How do chinese people call the firemen? By phone.

what do you call someone who cant breathe? dead

how did the farmer die? his dog shot him

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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