A horse shits himself SHITLESS!

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what do you get when you cross a dinosaur and a spaceship? a dinosaur spaceship

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How do you get a woman to stop nagging? Smack her in the face.

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why do leprecon's laugh when they run through the grass? because it tickel's their balls

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Q:whats the difference between grass and a car? A:They all have wheels, except the grass

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Billy: Hey hey hey!!!!! wanna hear a dirty joke? Joe: Sure Billy: A pig fell in the mud

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What's the difference between tires and a black guy? Tires don't scream once there are chains around them. ;)

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What did the man say after falling off the bridge? Nothing. He died a painful and terrible death on impact.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was suicidal.

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs because disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion).

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Roses are red, Violets are red, my eyes are bleeding

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What do you call a Muslim on a plane? A passenger, you racist bastard.

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What if someone sold your socks to a Jew? I would blackflip through the air and shit on his chest.

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, chickens aren't capable of crossing roads without being involved in a car accident.

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Roses are flowers.

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what is better than your entire family getting brutally murdered applesauce

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Why was the girl crying? She got shot in the penis

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just a man and his thoughts....and a smart phone app, and a loving family, thats not the point.

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Want to hear a scary story?' I was droppin a two ball and the monster walked in

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what's a fish with no eyes and out of water? its just a fish

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What did the little boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bike.

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What happened to the disabled man who went to Disneyland? He had a great time.

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whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a motorcycle nothing, I dont have either

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops