Why didn't the baby learn to walk? It got hit by a car.

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Whats worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an apple and finding half a worm. Wats worse then biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Biting into an eggplant and finding half a worm, as eggplants are usually more expensive so you will have wasted more money and would probably not be willing to eat the rest. And eggplants taste like shit.

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There is a mountain and there are three men, One is asian and the two others are black and white. "This is for my people!" Said the asian man when he was falling for his death. "This is for my people!" Yelled the african american. Then he takes the American man and throws him off the mountain

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why did the cow cross the road because he wanted to go to the mooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooove

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That awkward moment when you wonder why this person keeps stepping on you, and you realize that you’re a shoe.

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What did the limp dick say to the vagina? Is that rash contagious?

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What do you call a joke with no punchline?

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Cars were invented after her death, so she never had the opportunity to learn.

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Two men walked into a bar. Only one came out. What happened? One Passed out.

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Q: How do you scream at a purple? A: Black people

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You have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars. You both have the same amount of money.

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Ya know what's funny? A joke well-told by a professional comedian.

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What's the worst part about rollerblading? Telling your dad that you're gay.

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BAr intO a wAlks… sorry I wrote that joke after walking out of a bar.

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How do u turn on a lamp? Flip the switch

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An old jew, an irish man, and a young mexican woman in her mid 20's are on an island. They eventually become hungry to a extremely ravishing extent. The jew cries out: "I can't take the thought of consuming man, because I am only allowed to consume kosher" The Mexican says: "Alright" The Irishman says: "O.K. Until then lets head over to Timilio's... I hear they are a fine establishment and also serve Kosher meals."

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I saw a bull go into a public toilet and defacitate! Bullshit!!!!!! hahahahahahahaha!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To rape a duck

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says why suck a long face the horse shits on the floor and walks out

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How do you run faster than a cheetah? Cut off its legs.

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Whats 9 plus 10? 19

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Cry me a river. Then build a bridge and become a structural engineer.

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What did Oprah get for christmas? Weight Watchers

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Why is minecraft so awesome? Because real life is boring as crap.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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