What did the prostitute say to the pimp? Can I have $50? She was found three minutes later beaten to death with a purple cane, and had many imprssions of rings in her skull

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Simon says.. Nothing because he is deaf, so therefor he would have to sign it to you.

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What did the man with a cold say when a jew walked into a bar? Hahaha you walked into a bar. What did the man with a cold say when a jew walked into a pub? AHH-JOOOOO!!!

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A man walks into a bar. The other patrons suddenly start to run away screaming, because he had just been hit by a bus.

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A bishop died and went to heaven. At the Pearly gates he sees Saint Peter , so he says to Peter "All my life I've been a committed Christian, but I just before I died I was tempted by a woman of ill repute". Saint Peter says "This is just an illusion, your dying brain is merely conjuring up images based on your presuppositions of an 'afterlife'. You have about three seconds left"

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Whats the difference between a house and a mouse If you think about it , quite a lot really

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why did the boy die he had a raging case of cardiovascular disease

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why did the guy get pulled over he had a broken tail light

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A man walks into a bar. He is an alcoholic and his problem is destroying his family.

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What do you call a piece of Swiss cheese with human characteristics? Abnormal.

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Why did the astronaut drop his toolbox? Because he ran out of air.

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Sharvil has aids 4 times

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9. Why was 7 afraid of 9? Because 9 was black.

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How do you make a black man sad? Kill his entire family.

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A man asks his doctor if you can die from drinking to much water. The doctor replies 'Yes you can'

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I got a brother. He's bigger then you.

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Why does Billy Mays yell? He doesn't, he's dead.

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How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the fridge door and place the elephant inside. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the fridge door, remove the elephant, and place the giraffe inside. There is a party at the zoo. All of the zoo animals attend, except one. Which one? The giraffe, because he is in the fridge.

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Your mom is so skinny that she may have anorexia, yet she could treat it so she doesn't die.

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A hooker walks into a hospital. Only to find out that she has aids.

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What did the Shark attack victim say just before she died from her injuries? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Two blonds walk into a building....they couldnt see it.

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Q: you know whats a good movie? A: twilight.

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What happened to the orphan when it walked to the park? He found his birth parents........but then they were killed by a crazy hobo and he was taken away and molested

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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