What do you call a person who drinks beer a lot? Alcohol abuser.

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whats worse than killing someone? finding out your mom is your dad

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Why did the black girls wear fancy clothes to the mall? Public nudity is considered a crime in many parts of the world. It would be advisable to wear clothes in public areas, so as to avoid being arrested.

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Roses are Red Violets are Red My Garden is on Fire.

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A mermaid walks into a bar, but she has no legs, so she flops over and proceeds to drag herself into the bar.

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimer whats a rose?

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Why was the little boy sad? Because his dog died

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk into a prison. They're stopped by a gang. Hey, want to play a game? They answer "No thanks, we died in the last joke."

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Stab her.

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What do you call a dead man in a ditch? Phil.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" He says, "I have acromegaly"

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What do you call an Arab driving a Plane? A Pilot.

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What's the differences between oranges? Trees don't have doors.

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What do you call a building full of Mexicans? JAIL.

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Why was the guy with six fingers called John? His name was John.

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What did the viking say to the alien? "Vad i namn av valhalla är en utlänning gör här?"

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What's the difference between a lamp?

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How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?  The woodchuck's ability to chuck has been left indeterminable. Therefore until the wood chuck's prowess in wood chucking is brought to light we must leave it a variable. Using the coefficient (L) to represent wood that can possibly be chucked. Then using (C) to represent the life cycle of said wood chuck chucking. We are also assuming this woodchuck will remain vigilante and not require food or sleep for the entire duration of chucking ultimately lowering is maximum chucking output. From this we can determine the W.C.P.S. (wood chucks per second). Finally subtract the remaining wood (RW) from the chucked total and we have rendered that :  L(W.C.P.S) - (C -RM/t) = X

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What do Native Indians and Asian Indians have in common? They're both human.

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when god created an asian he said 'Crispy"

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Gorillas are black, Roses are red, Were out of milk, GET THE F**K OUT!

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Q) What do you get when you cross a brown chicken with a brown cow? A) An abomination

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Your mum's so fat that she's incredibly lucky she has a loving and supportive husband who values her personality over her appearance.

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This anti-joke below is hilarious.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops