Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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How did Moses make his tea? He steeped the tea leaves for around 5 minutes in hot water.

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MOTHER OF GOD! Someone get this horse out of here!

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When would you find a Mexican, Asian, Black and white guy hanging out? Never

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Who was the best Call of Duty World at War Player? A: Hitler he had 6 million kills and only 1 death

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Why is Jordan Abu Arabian ? Because his mom is!

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An automobile mechanic busted an engine fuse. A prostitute had oral sex with a Marine. An Inuit hunter detonated a sea mammal with TNT. What do they all have in common? They all blew a seal.

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What's racecar spelled backwards? Jesus.

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what do you call balls on richards chin? a dick in his mouth

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What do call a someone with no arms, legs, and has an eye patch? Names

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What did Superman get for Christmas. Nothing as he likes to stay detached from society.

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What's the difference between a mexican and a park bench? One is a minority whose ancestors originally lived in the central american country of Mexico, the other is a useful convenience that provides a place to rest one's legs in a public place.

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What do you call the people that ride on the upper level of a double decker bus? Passengers.

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1 white girl and 2 black men -TRAGIC

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What did the farmer say to the cow on the roof? Get down.

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What do you do when you see an elephant with a basket ball? Engage in play - if the elephant is playing with a basket ball it is most likely domesticated, and if it has toys it's probably well treated. Well-treated elephants raised in captivity are tolerant, sociable, intelligent and playful.

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Why did Princess Diana cross the road? She wasn't wearing a seat belt.

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Q. Why did the black man not get on the boat A. Because he gets seasick

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Knock, Knock Who's There A dyslexic kid with aides

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Why did Sarah fall of the swing, she had no arms. Knock Knock Who’s there? Not Sarah.

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Whats the difference between a truck full of babies and a truck full of bowling balls? You can't unload a truck full of bowling balls with a pitchfork.

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Why couldnt the woman wear her new necklace? She was decapitated

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Person 1: So now that were friends on facebook, you wanna hang out? Person 2: No I'd rather not.

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How do you stop a air plane? You throw small infants into the turbine.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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