Why did the boy throw his clock out the window? He was furious because it was the fourth time that week that it failed to wake him up for school, and he was going to be late again.

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“Before I know it, he’s got both of my hands in his viselike grip above my head, and he’s pinning me to the wall using his lips … His other hand grabs my hair and yanks down, bringing my face up, and his lips are on mine … My tongue tentatively strokes his and joins his in a slow, erotic dance … His erection is against my belly.”

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Q: What's worse than ten dead babies nailed to one tree? A: One baby nailed to ten trees.

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whats the difference between an orange and a bicycle? One has handlebars..the other one doesnt.

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Why did the man need new glasses? He was thrown off a bridge by a leprechaun.

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roses are red violets are blue, every 1 looks at you and call u a fool

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What does water taste like? Water

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Why did the pilot crash the plane? Because he was a loaf of bread

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?' The horse says "I was just diagnosed with testicular cancer."

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what do you call a seagull that flies over the bay? -a seagull

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STOP BULLYING FAT PEOPLE. They have enough on their plate

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im gay

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What do you call a Mexican hot dog? Lunch.

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? The Holocaust.

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What is 100(1+1) -100 + 50 x2 - 300? 0. But who cares? The answer is as worthless as you.

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What goes up but never comes down? This dick

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What do old people break when they fight? A sweat

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Why did the Chinese Arab buy blue paint? He already had red in his basement.

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What did Washington say to California? WC

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What did the kitten say to the ant? Nothing, it was dead. - Driiiftz

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adam hodgson !

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10+10=20. 20+20=40 40-10=30 I have 2 penises.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm only 13 so if you have sex with me it's illegal.

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what did Marvin Gay's father say to him before he died? "hey come listen to this 45 real quick"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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